Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Pursuit of Happiness....

Few days ago, I was sipping my hot coffee in our Company’s Canary wharf situated main office’s cafeteria. Even if I don’t work exactly in the area, but sometimes I have to come back to office for work purpose. Sometimes I have to come in the afternoon sometimes in the evening. Technically, I’ve worked with my father in India, but frankly speaking that was not even close to what you call a real job. I was never making money. I was only helping my father to share his work stress. So the current job I’m doing is what you call a real one!  I may sound little immature which I’m but getting paid by working has been kind of first time thing for me and I’ve enjoyed every bit of it.  

Coming back to the topic then like many routine days one day I came to the office. Office people told me to wait for some time. I had sometime before returning my way to home. I thought I should get freshened up with coffee.  I went to our cafeteria, made myself coffee and sat there to relax. No one was there in the room, and I just glimpse outside from the window. In UK day get shorter and shorter after the summer. Even it was 5:15pm by then it was complete dark out there. The taller buildings, the lights and everything around were eye catching. All I can say about the view that it was beautiful! It was like modern day Picasso for me.  One of the advantages of having your office in Canary wharf is that you can spend hours by looking at all the taller banks headquarter building surrounded by you.

I’ve had my upbringing in a small but not so backward these days in a city called Aurangabad, India (150 Merc and 101 Bimmers are solid proof for that!).  The tallest building we would have in our city would be of 10-15 floors. I had lived some time in Pune before coming to London. Architecturally speaking, difference between both Aurangabad and Pune is not as much as locals from both respective cities brag.  So, the change I felt coming from such city to Canary wharf, London was quite drastic and indigestible. Initially, there were days when I used to pinch myself to make myself believe that all what was going around me was all real and not some weird prank played by nature.

I’m so sorry I’m constantly taking you away from the real story and dragging you back but thats the fun I find as a writer. I’m not sure I was right but from what I saw, I think there is a taller residential building close to our offices. For a thought, I thought what fun the people must be having who lives on the top floor of that building. In the morning when they wake up, they surely get the best view of the city (after the queen of course!). I finished my work in the office and was on my way to home.  I called one of my dear friend in London whom I hadn’t had word for months, normally when you speak with someone after months you try to catch up from where you left and our conversation was not an exceptional for that. While talking to her I told her that I am leaving for my house from my office. Then she questioned about my office and whereabouts. Her reaction was the same which I anticipated from everyone when I told her that my office is in Canary wharf. She was surprisingly jealous about it (Its fine, I’m not at all offended!). Like every time we made fake promises to meet on weekends and hung up. I reached tube station and obviously the proud Orange network signal died as I got into the tube. Ironic thing about Network signals in the tube is that In the morning I get irritated by their absence since I’ve to make calls to Office people, friends send some emails, check Facebook status and catch up with cricket scores but in the evening when I’m returning to home after whole days stress when I want some peace around me, I find that absence blessing in disguise. 

The same thing happened to me on that day. I was thinking about the view, the top floor residents from taller building and my friend’s reaction about my offices location. I got into the tube for Stanmore luckily I got the seat in next station.

 From Sometime having the unemployed tag removed was not good enough for me. It was not all well at work. For no apparent reason we had cut off in our pay that development was obviously something which was bothering me. The worst thing about cut offs are that they always remind you about your old pays in a way which makes you feel that “Look dude you could have make this much money”.  There was no way in the earth that I was going to take that positively.

 Announcer in the tube announced that we were approaching London Bridge. I got off from the train and change my tube line to Northern Line. I think it was a lucky day for me I got the seat in that tube as well. Although I got seat it was still a crowded tube. Sometimes when tube is filled excessively you happen to see the people around you (I guess I could have put the thought that I don’t check out people in the Tube that often in a much much better way but nevertheless!).  I saw people around me. There were people from all the age, ethnic, race and religion. Regardless of their racial, cultural and age differences the one thing which I find common in all of them was that none of them were happy. First I thought it must be a lot to do with the work stress but it wasn’t just about that.

 I didn’t know any of them nor they knew me but I can tell the dissatisfaction from their faces. I can take my hand on my heart and tell you people that everyone in that tube was making more than me. There are going to be people who wouldn’t be making as much I do but the chain of dissatisfaction doesn’t end anywhere. I don’t know the people who work on the top floor of HSBC or Bank of America but I can tell one thing about them that none of them would be happy or satisfied about their achievement and accomplishments. 

The point or the crux of the story is that no matter where you are no matter what you do no matter how much you make there is no end to the satisfaction till you want it. If I’m happy working with I do then only I’ll be happy with my life. What do you think guys you think I’m right? Let me know what do you think of this by posting comment below the article.    

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Being Introspectual

“Just tell me something about yourself.” I guess everyone must have been questioned this question a lot of time; at least I have been for number of times. I still remember the first time someone asked me this question. It was a long time ago; I was in school by then and yahoo chat rooms were very popular in youngsters and I was not at all exceptional. I had this big craze that, I used to buzz every single girl from the chat room and in reply girl from the other side used to ask me this question.


Like me many of you must have answer that question. The only difference between my experience and yours is the venue difference of that question’s arrival. Someone must have answered that question in a damn serious campus interview where everything depends on your answer or some of you must have face that question when you first met your soul mate in a arrange marriage’s first meet. There can be many such incidences where people have answered or questioned this question to others.


Like mention above, there are different incidences and worst part of the deal is that each incidence is drastically different from each other, so it is crystal clear that there is not a specific answer to this question. I mean answerer has to pick the moment and have to answer the question accordingly. It is bit ironic that people have to build the answer by understanding the circumstances of a question which doesn’t change whatever circumstances may come.

To be very honest, it’s not the nature of question which bothers me, but the kind of confusion it carries and questioner being unaware of his callous nature literally throws that confusion on you. I think it is unfair for the answerer being thrown into such circumstances. In situation like these, one has to be very smart to understand the expectations of the questioner from you; otherwise there is a big possibility that things can go south within fraction of seconds.

Even for a moment if we ignore the circumstances, the real question which come into my mind where I ask myself, is it really that easy to judge myself...???. I am not being pompous about myself, but sometimes I do feel like I’m bit Schizophrenic. Not exactly schizophrenic like people who are suffering from that decease, but I do feel that there are two people inside me.

There is one whom I represent to the world and there is other one – the real me. The one part which I show to the world is really cool. This guy is the reason why people have respect for me. This guy is very funny at times. This guy is very dominating. He is someone who doesn’t believe in traditional ideology. He will only respect the people whom he adores. Sometimes he does cross the limit of sarcasm, but world treat him like child and forgives him in the next second.

The other part of me is very boring. If he replaces the real guy in me then world will lose interest in me. People will prefer talking to birds than chatting with me. I mean he is real me. The one who feel bad when a tree is being cut down, he is the one who feel that he is blessed to be born in middle class and liberal family when he sees poverty in India through movies like Swades and Slumdog millionaire. At times, when I write posts in my blog I strongly feel that the real guy in me has took over the pretended Nikhil.

So when People asks me about myself then I do get very confused who is real me???......Am I the one who laugh on an adult joke or am I the one who cries on silly situations? I hope you guys are getting what I am trying to say here. Please share your views and your take on these weird situations. Have a great day a head. Best luck...!!!